Something happened yesterday. Something interesting. But before I tell you what that thing was.., like always, here’s a little back story.
I was drained, as I got home yesterday. Most of the day was spent outside, at an amusement park, in the lovely company of my little sister, and mum. We had dinner afterwards, and by the time I got back home, which was sometime around nine thirty, I had a little over half an hour to get the weekly post in, with me being an early to bed, early to rise sort of person.
I was drained, dizzy, with most of me asking me to just go to sleep. I mean, one day without publishing a post wasn’t such a big deal, right?
Wrong! It felt wrong. I could not get myself to not put something out, to break the streak. I am a little superstitious about it. If nothing else panned out, I had the following planned:
Title : “How does a day without a post feel?” and then in the body “This!”
It was witty, or, at least seemed so to me.
But I was not going to have it! Maybe, it was the fact that I wanted to really, really write about love, or maybe, it was me, not wanting to break the routine set-up here. Whatever it was, I could not, not flip open the laptop screen and type. And so I did. I wrote a couple of a hundred words, then discarded that draft. Then, I tried something else, which too failed in a spectacular fashion. I ended up posting this, which I might say is pathetic to say the least. The only reason it is there is because of what it stands for.. which is also something this post is about.
This is not the first time, I wanted to write of it. An empty doc in the drive, title “On Persistence” is proof of it. Guess, I’ll have to remove it now. Anyway, back then, it was something I had achieved in my professional life, by continuing to stick my head out, even when I could see no response to it, day in and out. I managed to get what I wanted, which spurred me to write about persistence, but I managed to keep looking the other way, till of course, today.
How do you define it?
It’s that thing, I think, which does not let you quit when the going gets tough. That thing which makes you keep coming back, for more, and more, and more, and more, till you get what you wanted in the first place. That thing which lets you form nice habits, constructive stuff you know, if you continue long enough, as a consequence.
Persistence is the key to things. To writing, at least, for sure. The number of days, when things become uninteresting, and plain awful, are too many, if you cannot stick through, persist through the shitty stuff.
Yesterday was interesting, because I became aware of this quality in me. The post sucked, yes, but at least, I managed to put something out there! I managed to not break the streak. And that, is what the routine was all about!
As a consequence, it also forced me to type out this post, as an apology, and explanation for that excuse of a post, and made me think if I wanted to alter the routine a bit, publish a post everyday. I thought about that. But I am too scared of it turning into a chore. I can not have that right now. So, instead of that I’ll just churn out an extra post per week, the new schedule being: Monday, Thursday, Saturday.
Someday soon, I would have expanded it to include all seven days, without it feeling like a chore. I dream of that day with open eyes. Till then, we strive, you and I, in this thing together, for betterment, for growth, for love.